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The eve of destruction
The song, The Eve of Destruction, came on while I was eating supper tonight, and it stuck a nerve in a way it normally wouldn’t have. The news seems to be filled, everyday now, with stories of murder or suicide, countries ravaged by war or the latest, most heartrending event- children who are being forcibly…
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A fork in the map
Today is the first day I’ve written in my journal in over a week. I’ve thought about writing in it every day in passing, but other obligations kept intruding, and I packed the thought away, “for later” And now tonight, I open the blank pages and stare at June the 4th, the last time I’ve…
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Giants
I didn’t write yesterday. I thought about it, at least once an hour or so. But then instead, I found myself living, laughing and crying at talks given by insightful, amazing women with so much to share, Such wisdom and such humour. I’ve always thought that wit is something you can’t fake. You can study…
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Chalk in the wind
Some days work feels Like chalk in my hand Watching lives Blow away like sand I wonder sometimes If what I do changes fate Watching so many Become Mr or Mrs ‘the late’ Does it make a difference? Does it change things at all? When one of us is born, Another seems to fall I…
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Mommy guilt
Why does everything take longer than you think it will? Last minute packing always extends past the slated hour into another place altogether, where you begin to get nervous about not getting everything done. And then miraculously, it’s finished. Just in time to worry about what everyone will do without me. I know, logically, that…
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June the 5th
I realized halfway through today that I was off work on Friday. And on Monday! For the first time in ages, I’ve planned a conference that is about being a well person. Technically it is work related, and I’ll get credit, but I expect to see a few familiar faces and others who I feel…
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White nights and grey days
I couldn’t sleep at all last night. I went to bed at my regular time, the usual tired, nothing much to suggest it was going to be one of the ones I dread. Every now and then, often for no reason, I’ll catch myself staring at the ceiling for hours, tired but unable to drift…
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The aphids
Today, we went to the lake. We anticipated a day of riding bikes and possibly playing near the water, although most likely it wouldn’t be warm enough to swim. We drove up, grabbing breakfast along the way and the kids ate contentedly while we drove, watching a movie and allowing the adults to talk for…
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Retrospective
What do you have to look back on? Do you own a shelf of regrets, Or a wall of memories of families and friends? Times of celebration, birthdays and family reunions. Or does it show awards and achievements? When you look at them closely, were they alone, or with loved ones standing close by your…
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Breaking bad
What words do you say? The day you tell them they’re broken? Watching as their face Falls Collapsing into lines of sorrow As their dreams Blow away on the breeze How can you cushion The body blows? Soften the harshness Of a lifetime sentence? Is there a way to be kind As you cut out…